Camping Success

It was a grand weekend at Timberlane. The kitchen staff led by Fearless Co-Leader, Co-Leader Extreme and my mom made wonderful meal after wonderful meal. They were the real stars of the trip.

The weather was perfect. All the stations ran like a dream. We had a clear night for the observatory viewings. And everyone left on time!

It was a complete hassle-free weekend. A great big round of applause to all of my crew, especially my program aide girls who rose to occasion in style. I would put up pictures, but I while I remembered my camera, I forgot to put in a memory card. I hope some of the other leaders there got some great shots.

The Man stands alone

This weekend the Girl and I are headed out to Timberlane for our big rented-the-whole-camp event. This event was on the verge of cancellation two weeks ago. On the deadline day to sign up we had 27 people attending. I couldn't understand it because last year it was such a hit we had to turn people away. Even with the measly 27 though, we decided to go ahead anyway and just scale it back. I should have remembered who I'm dealing with here. Since the deadline, I've had more and more reservations trickle in as the leaders get their act together. Tomorrow we leave and we are 93 strong. What a relief.

Coincidentally, the Boy is also going camping this weekend with his troop. That leaves the Man home alone (with the dog and all the cats). Is he sad about this?

"I think I'm going to go up to Detroit for the day and get in a poker tournament."

No, I think he's fine.

Popcorn selling day

Oh, hello there! Popcorn Kernel here! I suppose you've all been losing days and nights of sleep wondering how our popcorn sale went yesterday. What? You say you didn't know we were selling popcorn yesterday at Sam's Club for four hours? Well, lucky for us there were plenty of good folk out there who stopped by to visit and just happened to have cash in their pockets.

Here's our table with our homemade signs. Pretty spiffy. We had some cans of chocolaty popcorn out, but it was so sunny we were afraid they would melt. If you had x-ray glasses on you could see them under the table.

Here's our first crew of salesmen.(Plus this one who had partied too hard the night before.)And the second crew. You've noticed, of course, the problem with being the son of the Kernel. You get stuck working both shifts. Poor kid.

It was all worth it. We sold $225 worth of product out there. That's pretty impressive considering the majority of it was made selling individual popcorn packets for $1 each. Not to mention that little cute Cub Scouts can sell popcorn just by flashing a goofy grin. Guys this big have to work extra hard to get people to shell out some cash for just for popcorn. Popcorn? Shell? Hey, son, that's a joke! Don'tcha get it?

Return to the River

We like to start out our Scout year with camping. This past weekend we kicked it out in style back at one of our favorite campsites, Singing River.

Our troop has never been so small as it is this year. Only six girls went with us to the cabin. But they brought so much stuff and spread it out so far and wide that it looked like 30 girls were living in there.

Weaver, the cabin has a new stove, refrigerator and thermostat. Sweet! The plumbing is still sluggish and the kitchen floor is always wet because the floor is seeping through the cracks. Not sweet. There was this big, braided oval rug that smelled so funky we had to kick it out. We put on note on it that it should never be let in again!

The highlight of the trip was our afternoon picnic by the river. This year we took the buddy burners and hobo stoves and made soup and grilled cheese sandwiches.

And don't even start on me about flip flops and outdoor cooking. It may have been anti Safety-Wise, but I assure you that no one was injured.

The only bummer was that when the river is this low, it's not as much fun to play in. Weaver, someday you'll have to come out with us. Olive's Grave is waiting!

Not about day camp... and yet all about day camp

I've started two post this week about being at Day Camp. But since they were boring as hell to write, I figured they would be twice as boring for you to read. This is the second year that Fearless Co-Leader and I worked the role of Business Managers which is the sweetest gig at camp. Here's the whole week at a glance.


Monday: We were in charge of overseeing the tie-dyeing of 150 shirts. My nails still look like Easter eggs.

Tuesday: Pretended to look busy most of the morning. Ducked out of camp on the pretense of buying charcoal (which we actually did buy), but also went out for lunch and showed up back at camp in time for closing flag.

Wednesday: Went to four different stores and spent about $350 on food for...

Thursday: Cook day at camp. Some units had successful meals. Some units had disasters. The Ad Staff cooked for ourselves and it was the single best day camp lunch I've ever had.

Tomorrow: Peering into the future I see us organizing tons of equipment before Ed shows to pick it up at noon. After that we'll just wandering around until it's time to pick-up the Popsicles.

That's about all you need to know about day camp. Now to share with you the song I've had stuck in my head all damn week making me crazy. Poor Fearless also had to suffer because she had to listen to me sing it.

We camped!

We are back and we survived just fine.

All in all I would rate this trip as fairly successful. True, it was grey and cold the whole time, but it never rained beside one extremely brief shower so we were extremely lucky. The meals went over well. There was no spatting or nastiness between the girls at all. Far from it, they were all so friendly and happy with each other that they talked constantly. There attitude toward us, the poor adults, was less than warm at times, but not unexpected. We stopped taking it personally a long time ago. Our girls are not crafty and have never been, but still we try to do at least one craft on trips like this. The craft this time went so horribly bad that it very well could be the last craft we ever attempt.

An action shot of the Girl filling her air mattress. We may be Girl Scouts, but nobody likes to sleep on the ground!

I mentioned it was cold? Even so, East Harbor has a beach and the girls insisted on going. And since the new model of our troop is "Let the girls lead" we took them to the beach. The sane adults sat on the cozy sand and watched a dozen crazy girls go bounding off into the water. When they all emerged, a very short time later, shivering and blue they admitted that it was a mistake to go. I'm not an "I told you so" kind of person, but inside I was cheering. Back at camp warm showers, building up the fire and hot cocoa happened in quick succession.

An unexpected highlight of the trip was a visit that I arranged by a park ranger. We were originally going to take a tour of Toft's Ice Cream, but they cancelled on us. Plan B involved the park ranger talk. Luckily, this woman was extremely interesting and complex. She had been with the park system for 18 years and had seen quite a bit of crazy stuff. On top of that, she raced sailboats, spoke Latvian and went to Ohio State on a volleyball scholarship. The girls listened like angels, asked intelligent questions and answered her questions maturely. I couldn't have been more proud.

The grand finale of the trip was Cedar Point. Cold, grey, but the lines weren't very long. We cut the girls loose with check-in times and made a very full day of it. I rode the Millennium Force for the first time and it truly deserves the title of best roller coaster in the world. Wow!

Stormy Weather

Friday night was the spring dance at school. The Girl was going, the Boy was headed out to camp with his troop. The weather looked bad, really bad. I wasn't keen on him going at all. Just before the boys headed out, the sun started to shine and the temperature rose. I took this as a good omen and they all set off.

The girlies went off to the dance a little while after that. About a half hour later, it started to rain. No, I mean RAIN, like an effing typhoon. The wind was shrieking, lightening flashed, the rain was coming down sideways for awhile! And my son is out there tent camping out at treeless, mud hole Amvets!

As much as I'm worried about him, that's has to wait because now I have to go pick up the girls from the dance. I was the pick-up person for the last dance and I played it all wrong then. Last time I got there right when the dance ended and got stuck in a snarl of traffic in a very dark parking lot. This time, I went a little earlier and got a parking space facing the door right where they were going to come out. Perfect. They would walk out, I'd give a little honk and we'd all be off.

So I'm waiting, waiting, waiting and they aren't coming out. Through the dark I spy the problem. There's this long line of cars and it looks like they are only letting the kids out of the building when their car is at the front of the line. The principal has a cell phone and is shouting into car windows getting kid's names. My plan is foiled! Now I have to get into this line and snake my way around the parking lot to the door. They've never done this before. It's not even raining anymore. What is going on?

I finally get to the door and they release the girls. And why did it go down like this? They had the kids in tornado position in the hall while they waited to get picked up. Like I said, it's not raining, not blowing, the stars are actually out. Ugh! Whatever. Better safe than sorry and all that. At least we can head out now. I hope the Boy is alright.

Back at home, I find the Boy sitting on the couch! When the storm blew up, they evacuated out of there double quick. I was SO relieved to see him! They boogied out of the there so fast they had to leave everything behind; tents, sleeping bags, everything! Fine by me, at least he was home because now it's starting to rain again. Enough! I'm going to bed!

9 AM the phone rings. It's the troop and they are headed back out. Could the Boy be there in the next couple of hours? He didn't seem to excited about going, but since all his stuff was out there, he really didn't have much of a choice. Saturday wasn't such a stellar weather day either with constant drizzle and sticking around forty degrees. They pitched all the tents under a pavilion, on top of gravel. I asked him what it was like sleeping on gravel. All I got was a grunt. He's not in the best of moods today for some reason!

So much can happen in a week

Five days since the last post! How ever have the three of you survived without know the cliffhanger ending to my car problems...the remote problems....the tree lawn? Fear not, the answers are here!



We forced the van back to the guy who put it back together and let him get a gander of the steering problems. His evaluation? Nothing that he could have done would have caused this impossible to steer situation and we should take it to Kia and have them check it out.



"So this is just a weird coincidence?", I said looking incredulous.



"Yeah, that's what I think", said the car guy, looking confidant.



Another fight to get the van back across town to Kia. A few hours later, the news was in. Amazingly enough, it was just a weird coincidence! What happened to the steering was not caused by the accident or by the repair. How about that?



The Man, in a burst of "getting things done", transplanted not one, but two trees from the side yard to the tree lawn. One is the little oak, which had massive roots and wasn't in the mood to get moved. The other is a little maple, which was much more obliging to get new digs. Now we'll have to wait and see how they do.



We picked up a new remote as well. The buttons are laid out weird and all the weight is in the wrong end. We're not happy with it, but it works.



Yesterday, Fearless Co-leader and I took all the girls to Kalahari for a giant day of water fun. It was a day filled with chlorine, very greasy pizza, screams and laughs. We couldn't have had a better time. My hat is off to other co-leader Tami. She fought through her fears and went down water slides when she really, really didn't want to, and then she went surfing! She put us all to shame with her bravery!

Pictures of all of this coming soon!

Wi-Fi Baby!

I may be too entirely excited about this but I am writing this from up in my bedroom! The WiFi is finally here. No more waiting for the Man to clear out so I can check an email or find the Pythagorean formula for math homework. No more dodging in to check the bills or my EBay while the Man is thrashing away at Guitar Hero. I've got my own space now!

This past Saturday was World Friendship Day for Girl Scouts. Our troop did Ireland and by the time we were done planning, it was out of control. We had our display, Shrinky-Dink pins, tattoos, a coin toss game, mashed potatoes and music. We needed three tables. Everyone else only needed one. And it was all on minimal effort, really. We barely put any thought into the thing at all.

After the festival, my trusted co-leader and I along with four of our girls hefted cookies door-to-door. (In truth, they hefted, we adults stayed in the warm van and talked to them with walkie-talkies!) In a combination of poor planning with a dash of sabotage, we have been burdened with about 30 cases more than we need. It's a problem. We ordered enough to cover all our cookie booths ahead of time based on last years numbers. But some of the cookie booths fell through and the ones that we ended up with are stinko. So now we are out pounding the streets trying to sell, sell, sell. It also doesn't help that my girls just up and decided not to sell cookies on their own this year. Girls who in years past have sold close to 200 boxes, this year sold less than 20. It was a troop wide epidemic. I know it's their age, but I didn't think it would be this bad! Ah well. We'll be having cookies as the troop snack for the next year!

Yesterday on the radio I heard that They Might Be Giants would be coming in concert this Wednesday. We love TMBG so much, even the kids. A quick discussion between us parents and we decided that we would take the kids to the show and let them skip school on Thursday. What rebels, eh? Come to find out that this "All Ages Show", is actually "14+, No Exceptions". I am so bummed out. I would like to know if it was TMBG who has slapped on the age restriction or the Beachland Ballroom, that gem of an establishment. I hear you, "Just take them anyway. No one's going to ask you for their birth certificates at the door!" And I would, if they could actually pass for being 14, but they just don't have that look yet. It would end up being a giant ass hassle, I just know it; The Man will end up in little snarking match with some pompous club owner and in the end we would all end up escorted away by security. I asked the Magic 8 Ball what we should do and it said "Ask again later". Sounds like good advice.

Survived on...Slop

I am not complaining in the least about the total lack of snow to "survive" on yesterday. It was a little cold, a little windy, it rained lightly for about 10 minutes and it stayed right around 40 degrees. It was lovely! But it was also muddy, deep and thick. It was that kind of mud that sucks at your shoes and threatens to keep them. If you weren't in mud, you were in completely saturated grass in which you sank, just slightly, with every step. But even that wasn't so bad, because it could have been so much worse. Everyone knew we had completely lucked out with the weather yesterday.

I took six girls along all in their screaming orange hats. I could spot them across Green Meadows and through trees. Other adults would point them out to me-- "There goes your girls!" Indeed, they made quite an impression. I'll have pictures of them soon.

There were nine stations that you had to travel to throughout the day: Lashing, knots, compass, land skies, fire building, flag ceremony, trivia, sawing and first aid. Awards were given out at the end of the day for patrols that performed well or did something that got the judges attention. When my girls got First Place for lashing, I couldn't believe it. I actually yelled "No Way!" right after they announced it in that big echo-y room and everyone turned to stare at me. My girls were not impressed with me but very much with themselves for this. They also got a "Cool Award" at the Flag Ceremony, the trivia game and the land skies. For being their first time ever trying something like this, they did incredible. They stayed in a good mood and had fun, which was pretty much all I was hoping for.

And what did I do all day? There were enough leaders there to make two adult patrols to do the stations. My patrol consisted of myself and four leaders from New London who all knew each other, but we hit it off right away. And we totally kicked total ass all day! We built our fire, cooked and ate our pancake in nine minutes. (A patrol of Senior Scouts beat us by doing it in seven!) We did the first aid challenge and my teammates carried me in blanket a fairly long distance and never dropped me. I'm very thankful for that! We got First Place at almost every station, completely stomping the other patrol of adults. (We found out around dinner that the other patrol of adults didn't even go to half of the stations and at the ones they did go to, mostly they sat around the fire, chatted it up with the judges and drank cocoa. So we got "First Place", but we were competing against nobody.) I'm very happy that I ended up with the leaders who felt like actually trying because I would have been miserable in that other patrol. By the fifth or sixth time that I had to go up at the awards ceremony to get my medallion, my girls said that weren't going to clap for me anymore because it was too boring.

Preparing for Survival on Snow

This little penguin is about to do a dumb thing in cold weather. Tomorrow, myself and six of my Scouts are also going to do something not-so-bright, (but probably not lethal) in equally cold weather. Tomorrow is Survival on Snow, the Girl Scout version of Klondike in Boy Scouts. It's an all day event where the girls travel from station to station and show off their skills. There will be knot tying, lashing, fire building, compass skills, first aid, flag ceremonies and who knows what else.

Are we ready? I hope so. I know I'm going to be dressed warm enough, that's for damn sure. I've tried to talk to the girls about what to wear and what gear to bring, but in the end it's up to them to dress and pack well. As for the skills, I'm not sure about that part. Luckily, they'll be judged mostly on their willingness to try, stay positive and work as a team. If they can't pull a skill off (that would be the fire building) or have no idea at all how to perform it (that would anything with a compass), then they'll still get credit for trying. They also have to show team spirit. For that they are all wearing these blindingly bright orange hats. If anything, they'll be memorable as that "Patrol of Girls in Orange Hats Who Giggle Too Much".

The scariest part of the day for me is that I'm not allowed to be with my girls. I can't go with them. I can't follow from a distance. I can't even be in the same part of the camp where they will be. I won't even see them until dinner, seven hours into the day. But I foresee lots of phone calls and texting during the day between us. I will be spending the day on my own team, a team of just leaders. My team will be out there kicking ass and taking names all day!. It should be a hoot! A cold hoot, but still. Send us warm thoughts!

Dear Man...

Hey babe! Today you left for Vermont, FOR THE LAST TIME! I am so proud of you! To stay in touch I'm going to try to post everyday here. (But there are no guarantees on the everyday part of it!)

After you left, the kids and I also took off for the GS party. For a short little two hour party, we did a lot. There were games, food, the gift exchange and then more games. I think it went off pretty well. As you can see, we had the party in the youth room where there is a ping-pong table, a pool table, Foosball and an air hockey table.

After we got home, the kids put together the Avatar Lego set. The canon shoots these little disks and there's a catapult the shoots little green things. There's a trapdoor inside as well. It passes all the tests for Lego coolness.

You are in Utica tonight. I hope you sleep well. Drive safe tomorrow!

Singing River Weekend

Our weekend out to Singing River was a big success. The weather was a little cool, but it stayed sunny all day and crazy starry at night. We had 12 girls out with us this time. Our afternoon lunch down by the river was every one's favorite part without a doubt. The girls built a fire and cooked out hot dogs and marshmallows for s'mores on the beach. Then after lunch...well...you can see where the girls ended up! Only a few fell in but they all had a big wet time finding clam shells and sinking ankle-deep into the clay on the opposite bank. It's been fairly dry, so the river was very low and slow, perfect for kicking around in. And going into the river wasn't an unplanned thing; these girls brought towels, extra clothes and shoes just for this! And yes, Weaver, they went up to Olive's Grave, but not at midnight, sorry to say. My foot and I had to stay behind for most of the hiking, which didn't make me, my darling co-leader or my girls very happy. But there's always next time!

I Shall Parade No More Forever

I'll start with a little story. Now this was some years back but I think I remember it close enough. It was my first year as a Brownie Girl Scout leader. The year had gone grand. But when April rolled around, my very good friend and co-leader started to talk about being in the Memorial Day parade in May...

Me, cutting to the chase: Look, I'll tell you right now, I don't do parades. I'll do pretty much anything else you need but not parades. I won't walk in a parade or ride in a float. I barely enjoy watching parades.


C0-leader, in blatant disbelief: But we walked in it last year....


Me, hard-core in my convictions: I wasn't here last year. If you want to take the girls, feel free. I won't be there.


I thought that was the end. I thought I made my position clear. And she didn't bring it up again, not until just before the parade.


Co, peppy to the last: I've got the permission slips for the parade. We're meeting in the parking lot at 9:30.


Me, ice princess : Have fun. I won't be there.


Co, slightly shocked: No?


Me, James Bond type cool: No. Won't. Be. There.


Co, laughing off what must be a bad joke: Sure you will.


Me, not joking: No way.

So the day of the parade comes and here's me in my little chair watching the city's finest march by melting in the heat and looking miserable. Lo and behold, here comes my troop of girls and leaders. I wave and smile as they pass by. Did they wave and smile back? No, not quite. Nobody likes to be stood up, but I think that when you say you're not going to be somewhere and then NOT show, all you are doing is keeping your word. But no, I was a betrayer, a spoil sport, loser.

However, I made my point. The word "parade" has never come up in a troop meeting again. There have been other organizations that I've belonged to over the years that have also put together a float or marched en masse behind some handmade sign. I'd have none of it. The reaction is always bad. Nobody likes a parade hater.

Well, I don't care! I don't like parades! I had to be in every stinking parade my entire childhood. Even out-of-town parades. It was the pits. We always got stuck behind some truck with fumes in our faces or behind horses leaving land mines or some lousy band playing the same damn song over and over and over again. I swore that once I was an adult and in control of my own destiny, I would never be in a parade again. So far, this has been a promise that I've been able to keep.

As a consequence of my loathing of parades, my kids have yet to be in one. This has caused several uncomfortable moments for them as well. Most recently yesterday as we were once again installed in our traditional parade watching spot, the boy's Boy Scout troop paraded by. As a group they glared at him and then me. We waved them on. They are certain to say something (and probably not in a nice way) at the next meeting. But again, we told them that we weren't coming. They shouldn't have been surprised.


I mentioned that I find even watching parades an iffy form of entertainment. I do like the marching bands and when the APL comes by with the dogs. My least favorite part is the endless line of tow trucks. Why do the tow trucks have to be in the parade? And why are there so many of them??? Isn't anyone broke down on Memorial Day morning? Maybe if our little hometown parade had floats like this, I would enjoy it more. Well, no, probably not.

My April Fools

The girl and boy turned a whopping 12 years old yesterday! Not only was their entrance into this world dramatic, but they had the pre-natal sense to arrive on a memorable day. Not a bad start and it's been a grand 12 years since.

Yesterday we celebrated with a houseful of family and a ton of food in the brunch category, complete with funnel cakes. After presents, I used my family members as slave labor to put together key rings for the kids to give out at school today in place of the customary cupcakes or treat bags. They were a surly crew (especially my Grandma!), but the finished products were worth the complaining. The afternoon was spent playing cards, more eating, drinking bad wine and lots of visiting. It was a lovely day. It felt like a mini Christmas! Here's one of the key rings we made (sans the ring). Ely colors with an Ely Eagle on the end.

Saturday, my co-leader Denise and I went to an all-day leader training out at Timberlane. Now that might sound like a drag to you, but we love to go to these things. We went to four classes. The first taught us what kind of chemicals you can throw into a campfire to make the flames turn different colors. The green worked and looked the best. (And yes, Brewer, we were very safety conscience!) Then we took a mosaic class. Glass was flying everywhere as we snipped and cut. This is what I made and I'm pretty damn proud of it. That's a mirror in the center, but in this shot it looks like a hollow box. Weird.

After lunch, we took a basket weaving class which probably was the single most frustrating thing I have ever done. The woman who taught this class should be put up for sainthood. She had a roomful of women who had just got done breaking glass, now trying to weave uncooperative reeds. The mood was tense. It was awful to start, but it did get easier, just like she said it would. Here's my basket:

After that it was African drumming, which was more fun than I thought it would be. Nothing to break or fight with, just things to hit. We had dinner at Boccardi's and I got to play hero as I ordered pizza to go and brought it home to my hungry crew.

While I was doing all of this, the man and boy were out playing paintball. They said they had a really fun time and they both have the mandatory number of bruises to prove it. The girl spent the day out with Grandma buying spring clothes for her AND her bear Lola. Lola ended up getting more outfits than the girl!

The big birthday present this year were tickets to go see Weird Al in July. They both get to take one friend and we'll make a wild day out of it. They're so excited! July can't get here fast enough!